45+ Extra Spicy Messages for Your Boyfriend That’ll Drive Him Absolutely Wild

Okay so, full confession time: I once spent forty-five minutes trying to send my boyfriend a spicy text and ended up just sending “hey” because I panicked. Like, I had this whole thing typed out, it was good, it was spicy, and then my brain was like “what if he screenshots this and shows his friends” and I deleted the entire thing and sent the most boring message in human history.

But here’s what I figured out after way too many failed attempts and a few successful ones that made him call me immediately – spicy texts aren’t about being some kind of professional sexter or whatever. They’re just about saying what you’re actually thinking, but like, the thoughts you usually keep in your head because society tells us girls are supposed to be all modest and whatever.

And look, I’m not saying you need to send him a full explicit novel at 2pm on a Tuesday. But there’s something really powerful about letting him know you want him, that you think about him in those ways, that you’re not just his girlfriend who helps him pick out throw pillows at Target but also the person who has some very detailed thoughts about what you want to do to him later.

So I’m giving you 45+ messages that are genuinely spicy, like the kind that’ll make him stop whatever he’s doing and text back immediately. Some are bold, some are teasing, some are straight-up explicit, and all of them will absolutely get his attention in the best way possible.

The Teasing Ones (Make Him Beg for More)

These are perfect when you want to get in his head and make him think about you all day. Drop the hint, don’t give him everything, make him want more.

1. “I’m wearing that thing you love under my clothes right now. Just thought you should know”
2. “Had a dream about you last night and I woke up very… frustrated. Guess you’ll have to fix that later”
3. “I keep thinking about what I’m going to do to you tonight and I can barely focus on anything else”
4. “You looked really good this morning. Like so good I’m still thinking about taking those clothes off you”
5. “I have a surprise for you later. Actually I have several surprises. None of them involve clothes”
6. “Can’t stop thinking about your hands. And where I want them. Text me back so I can tell you”
7. “I’m bored and when I’m bored I think about you. Specifically about you and me and no clothes and—”
8. “Just bought something new. You’ll see it tonight. Or maybe you’ll take it off me tonight”
9. “I have plans for you. Very specific plans that I probably shouldn’t describe in a text but here we are”
10. “Remember that thing we did last weekend? I want to do it again. Like right now”

The Bold and Direct Ones (No Games, Just Want)

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Sometimes you just gotta say exactly what you mean. These messages leave nothing to interpretation.

11. “I need you inside me. Like yesterday. When are you getting home?”
12. “I’m so turned on right now thinking about you and it’s honestly becoming a problem”
13. “I want you to pin me against the wall the second you walk through that door”
14. “I’m touching myself thinking about you and wishing these were your hands instead”
15. “I want to feel your body against mine so badly I can’t think straight”
16. “Come home. Now. I need you and I’m not asking nicely”
17. “I want you in my mouth. That’s it, that’s the whole message”
18. “Tonight I want it rough. Don’t hold back”
19. “I’m so wet thinking about you right now, this is your fault”
20. “I need your hands all over me immediately, this is not a drill”

The Build-Up Ones (Set the Stage for Later)

These create anticipation throughout the day so by the time you’re together, the tension is already at level 100.

21. “I’ve been thinking about tonight all day and I have a very detailed plan for what I’m doing to you”
22. “Fair warning: I’m attacking you the second I see you later”
23. “You’re not sleeping much tonight. Just letting you know in advance so you can prepare”
24. “I’m counting down the hours until I can get my hands on you. Currently at 4 hours and it’s torture”
25. “Tonight you’re all mine and I’m not sharing you with Netflix, your phone, or anything else”
26. “I’m going to do that thing you love. And then that other thing. And then probably that thing again”
27. “Get ready because when I see you later I’m going to show you exactly what I’ve been thinking about all day”
28. “Tonight’s agenda: you, me, bed, no clothes, multiple times”
29. “I’m giving you a heads up that tonight I’m in charge and you’re going to do exactly what I say”
30. “By the end of tonight you’re going to know exactly how much I want you. Fair warning”

The Compliment + Spice Combo (He’s Hot and You Want Him)

These tell him he’s attractive while also making it clear what you want to do about that attraction.

31. “You’re so fucking hot it’s actually unfair. Get over here so I can show you what you do to me”
32. “The way you looked at me earlier made me want to rip your clothes off right there”
33. “I can’t stop staring at your body and thinking about all the things I want to do with it”
34. “You have no idea how sexy you are and it drives me crazy. Come here so I can demonstrate”
35. “Your arms look so good today and all I can think about is them wrapped around me while we—”
36. “How are you this attractive? It’s honestly distracting. I need you to come fix this distraction in person”
37. “That thing you do with your hands? Yeah, I need that. On me. Everywhere. Now”
38. “You’re walking around looking like that and expecting me to function normally? Not happening”

The Late Night Ones (When You’re Alone and Thinking)

Perfect for those nights when you can’t sleep because you’re too busy thinking about him in very specific ways.

39. “Can’t sleep. Keep replaying every time you’ve touched me and now I’m too worked up to rest”
40. “It’s 2am and I’m lying here wishing you were here doing things to me that I shouldn’t text about but I will anyway”
41. “Wide awake and the only thing that would help me sleep is you. Inside me. For like an hour”
42. “Lying in bed thinking about your mouth and where I want it and I’ve given up on sleeping”
43. “I’m so horny right now and you’re not here and it’s honestly the worst. Get here tomorrow please”
44. “Can’t turn my brain off because it keeps showing me mental images of you and me and I’m not mad about it but I am frustrated”

The Post-Sex Follow-Up Ones (Keep the Energy Going)

After you’ve already been together, these messages let him know you’re definitely not done thinking about it.

45. “Still thinking about last night and I already want round 2”
46. “I can still feel you and it’s making me want you all over again”
47. “That was so good I’m literally still recovering. When can we do it again?”
48. “My body is still tingling from what you did to me. Come back and do it again”
49. “I keep replaying last night in my head and getting turned on all over again. This is your fault”
50. “Last night was incredible but I have some new ideas for tonight if you’re interested”

Here’s the Thing About Sending Spicy Texts

I’m gonna be real with you for a second. The first time you send one of these messages, you’re probably gonna feel weird about it. Like really weird. You’re gonna type it out, delete it, type it again, stare at it for five minutes, and then maybe send it while immediately throwing your phone across the room so you don’t have to watch him read it.

And that’s totally normal, by the way. We’re not exactly raised to be super comfortable expressing sexual desire, you know? Like, we’re supposed to be wanted but not too wanting, interested but not too interested, sexy but not too sexual. It’s exhausting and it’s bullshit.

But I promise you, your boyfriend wants to hear from you that you want him. He wants to know you think about him like that, that you find him attractive, that you desire him. Guys don’t get that validation as much as you’d think. They’re always expected to be the ones initiating, the ones pursuing, the ones expressing desire first.

So when you flip that script and tell him exactly what you want? It’s honestly kind of mind-blowing for them in the best way.

When to Send These (Timing Matters)

Look, there’s an art to the spicy text, and timing is everything. Here’s what I’ve learned:

Good times to send:

• When he’s at work (but not during a meeting if you know his schedule)
• Late at night when you’re both in bed but apart
• After you’ve been flirty all day and you want to up the stakes
• When you know he’s having a boring day and could use the distraction
• Right before he’s coming home
• After you’ve already had sex and you want him thinking about next time

Bad times to send:

• When he’s with his family (learned this one the hard way, his mom was sitting right next to him)
• During a crisis or when he’s dealing with something serious
• First thing in the morning if he’s not a morning person
• When you’re fighting or things are tense between you
• When he’s driving (safety first, horniness second)

And honestly? Read the room. If you send something spicy and he responds with “lol ok” or something equally boring, maybe he’s just busy or distracted. Don’t take it personally. Try again later when the timing is better.

Make It Sound Like You

Here’s the most important thing: these messages are just ideas. Templates. Starting points. Don’t copy them word for word if that’s not how you actually talk.

Like, if you never say “fucking” in regular conversation, maybe don’t start now in a spicy text. It’ll sound weird and forced and you’ll feel awkward about it. Use words that feel natural to you, even if they’re less explicit.

The point isn’t to sound like a porn script or some perfect seductress. The point is to communicate desire in a way that feels authentic to who you are. Your boyfriend is into you, the actual you, not some character you’re trying to play.

So if you’re more of a “I want you so bad” person than a “I need you inside me” person, that’s totally fine. Say it your way. The sincerity matters way more than the specific words.

What If He Doesn’t Respond Well?

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Okay so, real talk. Most of the time when you send a spicy text, your boyfriend is going to love it. He’s going to respond enthusiastically, maybe even call you, definitely think about it all day, and probably bring it up later like “that text you sent was so hot.”

But sometimes, for whatever reason, the response might not be what you hoped for. Maybe he’s genuinely busy, maybe he’s with people and can’t respond properly, maybe he’s just not in a sexy headspace right then.

And that’s okay. It doesn’t mean you did something wrong or that he doesn’t want you. It just means the timing was off.

Don’t spiral into “oh god he thinks I’m weird now” or “I never should have sent that.” Just… let it go. Try again another time. Communication, even spicy communication, is about finding what works for both of you, and that sometimes takes a few tries.

And if he consistently doesn’t respond well to these kinds of messages? That’s a conversation worth having. Not in the moment, not right after you send something, but later when you can talk about what you both like and want and how you prefer to communicate about sex.

Because here’s the thing: a good relationship should have room for you to express desire without feeling embarrassed or shut down. If you can’t even send your boyfriend a text saying you want him without it being weird, that’s something to work on together.

The Confidence Thing

I know a lot of you are reading this and thinking “I could never send these, I’m not confident enough.” And I get it, I really do. Expressing sexual desire feels vulnerable, especially as women who’ve been taught that being too sexual is somehow bad or wrong or whatever.

But confidence isn’t something you wait around to magically have one day. Confidence is something you build by doing the thing that scares you, even when it feels uncomfortable.

The first spicy text I ever sent my boyfriend, I was literally shaking. Like full body trembling because I was so nervous about how he’d respond. And you know what he did? He called me immediately and said “that was the hottest thing you’ve ever sent me, more please.”

And suddenly it wasn’t scary anymore. It was fun. It was connecting. It was another way to show him I wanted him and to feel wanted back.

So yeah, send the spicy text even if you’re nervous. Send it even if it feels weird at first. Send it even if you’re not sure you’re doing it right. Because there’s no “right” way to tell your boyfriend you want him, there’s just your way.

And I promise you, your way is good enough. More than good enough. It’s exactly what he wants to hear. 🔥

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